Am I allowed to make my facebook status "loves farting in chairs"? I think it would shock every boy that I am friends with.
she just announced that once she was paid to deep throat a light saber with a mint flavored condom on it. i'm speechless.
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
And PS thanks for calling it my "sexual liberation" and not "slut fest 2010: part deux!"
Get to the bar. Power hour leading up to the rapture.
I'll have you know that I'm still picking duct tape residue off my wrist from sunday
Bisexual Viking-cowboy hybrid is at the bar again
Dibsssss
I wonder what acid is like for a blind person... Can we find this out?
I got a thank you card in the mail from the virgin i slept with on the camping trip. Weird or the new classy?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
it is shots o' clock and I am never late
So I almost just died there. And we need a new garage door.
he was definitely tindering while i gave him head
sorry for running off in the middle of that heart to heart. free food.
I can't dude. Last time I was there, I blew the bartender in the bathroom at last call.
Randomize
