I am pretty sure the guy in the stall two dwn from me is jerking it...seriously
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
My carpet still smells like piss and I THINK YOU KNOW WHY.
He came in the heat vent in my car. Don't ask how it happened.
she told me she sucks everyone's dick but mine because mine is too big and "hard to suck" i need to reevaluate the girls i fall in love with.
I've never heard a "this is the reason why i dont suck your cock" explanation go in that direction
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
Is that you who's passed out on my treadmill?
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
I was in the rappers prayer circle. Then they're blunt circle
When a guy asks for your ig but you already know his blood type, social security number, & mother's maiden name.
Oh lord. I have no recollection. I just got up. Surveying the damage. Found phone with messages out by pool. Still have not located my top or determined when i stopped wearing it
Ehh, the third backed out. Two still isn't bad. Who gets a bootycall to pick them up from a bootycall's house anyways? Only me.
the cops drove by and you were on your back in the middle of the side walk with your arms and legs in the air yelling that you were a dead bug .
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
It was like I was gay for pay but except being gay I became straight and instead of for pay it was for coke.
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