Come with me and I'll find you a girl. What's your type?
Vagina
Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
Just turned elections for the sorority into a drinking game. Right on.
He had an itunes playlist named "def not Glee season 1" which contained all of Glee season 1
i was just singing like a virgin out loud my mom told me to stop kidding myself
you are my new fav person for making him do the walk of shame in pink footie pajamas!
I guess you don't realize how much twelve bags of chips are, until they're all over your floor.
I get credit on the assist, you can thank me by taking a pic of her ass under the covers and sending it to me. It would make my YEAR
i was able to set 4 alarms to make sure i woke up in time for class but i couldnt take the open beer out of my pocket before i did cartwheels down the hall...
hes the hot one from work who thought i was dead after my party
He was puking up tons. He aimed his face inside his coat. Not a drop in my car. Then he thanked me for the ride.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
Im gonna get home and destroy this bag of chicken nuggets with my soul.
I wore home his HoHoHo boxers. I've never felt such a connection to an article of clothing.
Henceforth: booty calls will now be referred to as "deliveries of anatomy". That is all.
Randomize
