DOES ANYONE KNOW THE NINJA TURTLES
Sarah Palin just got hired for Fox News. Watch out Jersey Shore... there's a new drinking game in town
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
when you greet her, try not to lead with "this night will end with you on top of me". first impressions, bro.
We were high as shit. We argued for like ten minutes about going to Dunkin Donuts and then just ended up rolling down hills. Thanks for the weed.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
I'm pretty sure NORMAL roommates don't have to hide each others sex toys from their fuck buddies.
Just took physics exam. I think this is one of those 'chuck it in the fuck-it bucket and become an art major' days
I wish I could take a screenshot of how things literally look from my eyeballs right now
Was I drunk or did Alex not show up with 100 rainbow Jell-O shots?
We're the worst. Two people without their shit together do not make a functional adult.
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
Hope everything goes ok. If it makes you feel better, I straightened vomit into my hair and killed a bird earlier.
I JUST WANT TO SIT IN MY UNDERWEAR AND WATCH THE BRAVES GAME AND NOT BE CONSTRAINED BY MY ED SHEERAN SHORTS
Randomize
