Your brother just successfully got half the bar mostly naked
just smoked a blunt while listening to nsync. i now know what my childhood was missing.
RJ thinks I should put one of the muffins in my vagina. Good idea or bad idea?
I've now graduated to the level of gay where I can tell Tegan and Sara apart.
Well if all fails we can always become surrogate mothers. I hear that pays well.
I'm lonelier than Tom Hanks in Cast Away, right meow. Ready to make this bong my Wilson.
at the end of the day, college isnt gonna be for everyone... and some of us are just going to have to learn how to breathe underwater while sucking cock.
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
Do you think they manscape in the zombie apocalypse?
I woke up to find I still had sequins under my tits. I'd say Sunday was a success.
I feel like I'm in a astronaut outfit like I'm a spaceman & I'm just floating around cause that's all you do in space is float and I'm floating to be in detail
Houston we have a problem
Tonights mission: get trashed, smoke a bowl on top of the silo, get some dick. Not necessarily in that order.
Woke up went to work ate beef after three year hiatus shat my pants went to bed
On a scale of having tea with Ghandi to the apocalypse how bad of an idea is it to drink with a 100 degree fever?
Randomize
