So is it bad that I'm using this 21 year old for his hot bod and utter naivety?
No its what 21 year olds are made for
I have demons in me.
so i was pissing and the phone rang but i forgot i was pissing so i just ran to answer the phone. it was too late when i realized
you said "tonight pinky, we take over the world" and then came in my face
wait can you just look around please? that was my favorite bra and i've already asked like 3 other guys
its barely noon and he already threw up and i have second degree burn
I was really stoned haha. I had sex with her while I cooked scrambled eggs.
say 'i' if you broke up a fight involving your father at TD bank today....
I'm going to die alone in my chair and get eaten by my cat. That kind of break up.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
We're doing a team debriefing of Saturday night in group text right now. As 75% of the female presence at that party we saw some shit.
Hey, Would it be ok if me and your wife have a ladies only night and masturbated on FaceTime together?
It was hands down the most magical fuck I've ever had
It was the only fuck you've ever had..
I ate all your munchie Mac and Cheese cause you left me on the lawn. If you don't want it to happen gain, drag my drunk ass inside next time
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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