hot girl, 5 o clock
do you know how to read a clock?
My fave moment of today was you sitting in a hot pink innertube puking into the ocean in front of a lot of children. i would have held your hair back but the ocean did it for you.
oh don't forget that when we go furniture shopping we have to find a matching bong so put more money in the furniture fund
Minus the pink eye. Do I look fuckable tonight?
I masterbate to the thought of you. You totally aren't just a booty call.
Maybe if more guys knew my pillowtalk occasionally includes me scribbling notebook diagrams of cell signalling pathways, I'd get laid more often
Check having sex on the rocks and dirt on the peak of saddleback mountain off my list.
I felt like a god.
Day drinking is so dangerous way too many construction workers out there to flirt with
Idk how much more i could have responded my dick was basically trying to unzip the zipper and hop out
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
I just want somebody who'll randomly bring me pizza and lovingly squeeze my butt. Is there a dating app for that, do you think?
I know right. I don't even want to have sex today. I did anyway but that's besides the point.
Holy. shit. Chris has no pants on. In public. Fuck. Need you.
I. Am. Not. Tattooing. My. Penis.
I just googled "how to blow an uncircumcised guy" and did serious research. That's how badly I want to fuck him.
You misuse your internet privileges.
Randomize
