guess who was drunk and crawling in the middle of the road and got brought home by the police last night? HINT: ME
Blackberries need to come with a feature that disables texting to certain numbers after 2am based on content. liek disabling texting to 'dad' containng the words 'lets try to find more blow.'
I took chris brown's side in the conversation ... cut to me not getting laid tonight
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
Did we have sex last night or did we just wake up naked covered in oil?
Just got back from my 9:00 am class to find my roommate soaking her lifesaver gummies in vodka so she can have them for a snack in class later.
when i got home i made myself toast with butter & put pasta on it. I know this cause it's all over my bed.
College students should never be allowed to have snow days. Never.
woke up laying on an empty pizza box and some guy was doing blow off my butt...i guess i should thank you.
... They left for 10 minutes and came back with a lobster he's in the toilet downstairs
That awkward moment when you can't tell what smells like tacos: you, the cat, or the strange guys blanket your so tenderly swaddled in.
She is larger then a hippo. You could cut her open in the middle of a blizzard and crawl in like Luke skywalker. Throw a couch and a tv in there and you're set
I feel as if we moved beyond the hook up stage when she blew me as I drunkenly finished my chicken nuggets.
Soooo we should kick it sometime when it's like light outside. Drink outta cups.. Be bitches. 7, 6, 3, 5.. 4, 2, 1... Sschhkiddaellladiieessscchk
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
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