My family just had an in depth argument about the meaning of chodes
woke up 7 floors down in the lobby...i my underwear. New high or new low?
New experience?
I wish there was a lawn mower version of Roomba so I could just drink and cheer it on from the stoop.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
You were chewing up hot dogs and spitting them out
yeah, its right past the deli mart where i showed my right tit for mozzarella sticks.
If you fool around, take the WHITE sweatshirt off of her first. It's mine, and I don't like your cum nearly as much as she does.
got extra credit for showing up to class before a holiday. it hit me 5 minutes later that she meant easter....
Using that mug my little cousin painted for me as an ashtray for my weed...at least next time he asks me if I'm using it I can say yes
He left an apology note saying he had to work and that there was coffee, OJ and food on the table with two Excedrin. I left his spare key with the door guard and she said "too bad I don't go for skinny white boys or I'd jump you both!" Best one night stand ever.
Fucking her was like skydiving commando in a flightsuit made of kittens
I really feel like I should slow down on the getting hammered. I told a bartender on "Taco Tuesday" that a $3 margarita was too expensive. And proceeded to have a $70 tab.
i just watched a 27 minute video about owls...that high.
Well he had a nice beard and it smelled good so there was no way I wasn’t going home with him.
Remember that time we were together? Yeah, I don't miss that.
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