break up sex still means we will always be broken up.
then he goes, "ok, i have to go talk to the girl i'm semi-talking to/dating and see if i'm in trouble" WHAT IS MY LIFE?!
I just found out the guys at work had a bet as to who could sleep with me before i move away.
Who won?
All of them.
you know i'm gay cause i'd have sex with lady gaga. what straight man would say that?
I got to watch him fuck me from behind in the reflection of an ornament. so glad I decorated.
She nearly killed the mood when she said "Don't cum on my spray tan"
So i'm in a museum and theres a punch bowl from 1765 with a picture of 3 men forcing the 4th to drink the punch bowl. Colonial hazing
It Amazes me that I was able to drunk update my status in Spanish last night.
He held the beaver pelt from the fireplace over my crotch and asked his friend "she look familiar now?", he then remembered my name.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
It's a little sad/awesome that I scored coke within 60 seconds of walking in the bar.
The student becomes the teacher.
All i remember his him yelling yahtzee while pouring beer down her shirt .
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I can't believe there are people our age getting engaged and I can't even find a solid coke dealer.
if wiping your ass w an envelope isnt the definition of hitting "financial rock bottom " then nothing is!
Randomize
