# days @ Coachella: 1 people i showed how to break it down: 279
I don't smoke a lot but now and then I do. Weed and I are like still standing naked in a bathroom together deciding if we should blow one another or bolt for the exit. An awkward relationship.
They say rihanna has been dating several mets players. They go on to say that she feels safe with them because they can't beat anybody.
i was puking in the toilet, he walked in and to talk to me and started puking in the sink.. Could this be my perfect man??
Desperate + desperate does not equal a fun night.
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
She found 60 bucks at the strip club. Its probabably been in a vagina but really most money probably has
Went to the wedding reception, and he left with ALL of the brides maids phone numbers. I don't know how he does it either.
Yeah everyone's alive and well besides the still terrifying threat of Ted's conception of a human being
want to know what my life has come to? I just took a 45 min shower banging on the walls and making loud sex noises so my neighbors think I get some.
As we have told you before, the first rule of hook-up bingo is we don't talk about hook-up bingo
Remember that cop that blew me in the parking lot a few weeks ago? He's possibly with his wife and kids shopping at Target.
HANDS OFF UNTIL AFTER I DO BUTT STUFF WITH HIM.
Listen I don't care what it's called as long as it's drugs
I texted her mom a picture of us doing it saying "I'm trying to make your daughter just like you!" she was not amused.
Randomize
