quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
we've reached the level in our friendship where i don't think he would rape me
i was so drunk he made me beileve the song was called "thanksgiving sex."
Bring my lunch to work in liquor store bags is doing nothing for my career
All I know is that it's pretty damn mean to put a glass wall in a bar.
Well it was 11am and we were walking to the market with red cups in our hands yelling NO JUDGEMENT at every car that passed
Just FYI, I'm breaking up with my boyfriend tonight and you need to be on call to be my first rebound bang
We are, if nothing else, classy enough to leave our 10 mini bottles of wine in a polite line on the floor of the movie theater.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
Did you mean to cry when you finished last night? Or were you just that drunk?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
I think the guy I was trying to dance with was an undercover cop...
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
I am NOT pregnant
My barren womb can FUCK WHOEVER I want
Newest quarantine problem - I’ve watched all of the porn. Like everything on the the internet, all the DVDs, mags, VR, leisure suit Larry all of it and I’m still horny af
Randomize
