So I just had this crazy idea, and no it has nothing to do with the fact that they made me take shots at work.
Are they still out there making out on the couch? How can we get them to leave?
I 'm gonna go stand naked in the kitchen with a knife
New drinking game: drink every time the guy whose room we are in is creepy
enjoy the hospital
Oh, and for future reference, telling a guy that your ass is too tight for anal is like painting a bullseye on it.
its not college until your roomate walks in on you having sex in his bed. twice
you know...the drug dealer i named my baby after.
Shit. We're going to have to drink until they're cute
Hello cirrhosis
Fantastic. I'm pretty cold, tired, dirty, and hungry, but that comes with an adventurous weekend. Who needs a wallet or keys anyway? I could totally be homeless.
We're both on the slippery slope toward middle age...and really shame riddled bar experiences
Even completely stoned shes amazing on the piano. There are like 7 people sitting on the ground listening to her like she's the messiah.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Did you see the video of me eating a marshmellow on fire?
Just made a jeopardy bj game. Every question has 10-50 seconds on it and if he's right that's how many he gets.
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
Randomize
