There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
There was a lot of him and a little penis
I'm gonna answer everything she says with 'cum on da face' until she breaks up with me...great idea or greatest idea?
just to let ya know we might have to take a stripper snowboardin sometime
Turned out not to be so bad. He had a big dick and i owed him for all the free beer over the year.
this whole plan B standoff thing with her is really starting to make me nervous
Shrimp lo Mein doused in green apple Smirnoff is a rare delicacy only a few get to experience..guess I should consider myself lucky
So, I'm playing the Doctor Who drinking game with my dogs, but they don't understand quite when to drink. Still counts as successful, though, right?
The ultimate Father's Day bonding experience: Both getting bailed out of jail by mom for mooning some shithead cop.
Here's the level of my committment: I'm not participating in the Olympic opening ceremonies drinking game. THIS IS SERIOUS.
Good. We don't answer calls at dick thirty.
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
with a cock that big I don't even care that he makes a convincing drag queen
He asked me if I want to play Uber Driver, is this some new sex game or is he drunk and asking for a ride home?
I'm glad we smoked together,that was probs the biggest sibling bonding we will ever have.
Randomize
