Bonnaroo quote of the day: "why the fuck am i pregnant?!?!" - exclaimed loudly by random hippie.
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
I just remember telling jokes while vomitting
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
Hello you've reached the get a clue corp. Our business hours are from take a hint to figure it out, eastern standard time. If you prefer to leave a message, don't, call back when you're not crazy, fat, and annoying.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
Marshall is naming all the elements of my face. I love science nerds.
He sent me a mirror pic of himself and sent it to me and all i could think about was the amazing bong hits i took with his roommate in that bathroom.
who started the 'put a scrunchy' around his balls' game?
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
Well you ended up trying to convince two Greek girls that you were Greek, but failed massively by shouting at them in Spanish, and then almost vomiting after taking way too much snuff. Maybe lay off the guinness next time?
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
His sex game is strong it’s like a warlord’s dick! you know what I mean?
Nope
Randomize
