I hope you never procreate. Philly is already the ugliest city in the country.
It smells like weed.
We are in Boulder, Everything smells like weed.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
Why do i always get involved with 3 women at once?
Because life brings drama and thus like moths to a flame, women
he told me he had a problem with me going both ways. like what the fuck. what guy says that to a girl? goodbye planned threesomes...
She's in the middle of blacking out but is singing Mariah carey songs. Hitting every note.
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
so the photographer said "let's get a picture of the cousins" so we posed together, and then he said " lets get a picture of the couples" So we posed together.
We sent off fireworks off in the taco bell drive through. They're taking it way too seriously.
Did u smell a guys dreadlocks in the McDonald's drive thru line last night or did I dream that?
How long can I keep it classy to hook up in my old office building? Two more years? Does it get weird after 30?
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
Do you remember standing up at 3 in the morning and asking me if I was counting to six?
Randomize
