I introduced my face to asphalt last night. They didn't get along.
All these guys look like the American Apparel version of Jesus...
I made a mac n' cheesicle. Better in my head than in real life. Gonna keep smoking to see if it gets better.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
Is a box of franzia too insincere of a gift for "i'm sorry I backed into your toddler with my car"?
lets grab drinks (in a friendly, not super awkward because ive eaten your ass kind of way) sometime soon
wow.
The sun is so bright. Whhyyyyy. EYES ARE DEAD.
Just saying goodbye until I figure this whole "warrant out for my arrest" thing
Is there a law against that?
Nope not at all. Just morals. But fuck it, this is college, not real life.
Apparently he took me home and I pulled up my senior pictures on fbook and made him guess what I was thinking during each different pose.
preface to our conversation: my vagina hurts.
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
I just had a mental image of us riding a tractor through hell with one of those big guns mounted on top of it shooting at everyone while the indiana jones music plays.
Dude I puked in a snow bank and then fell face first into it
My chance to home wreck was right in front of me and I didn’t grab it by the balls
Randomize