I can't tonight. I'm still nursing a beach sex injury. Don't wanna talk about it.
I envy your ability to put any word in front o the word beer and make drinking before 5 sound like a socially sanctioned event.
Midgets have it so easy. They have so much less leg area to shave.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
That glade motion activator thing keeps going off every time we pass the bong. I don't know what I'm getting high off right now.
I am not kidding you. There is an airport luggage cart overturned in my driveway. We need to stop going to the airport bar.
I think its safe to assume that the 40yr old undergraduate with purple and pink in her hair and a tattoo of the eiffel tower above her ass crack has never actually been to Paris...
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I'm pretty sure male strippers are the last things I need in my life right now.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
just curious, were the inflatable penis' received? Amazon says they were delivered.
I got a hand job after work. Remember those? From the 90s...
One minute we're singing Wagon Wheel, and the next you're belly dancing in a trash bag on the beer pong table
Randomize
