How did you manage that?
Told her it wasn't GENITAL herpes... just ORAL herpes... on my penis
lol... jersey girls rock
got them to do a wheelbarrow of shame down the sidewalk after the threesome. I rule
I don't know what kind of drugs you were on last night but you kept trying to highlight my face because you said I was important
right before he came he said "im ganna fill your stocking" nothing like holiday spirit!!
It was 5 a.m. and we found him making margaritas with nyquil...
It's like the only way I know how to apologize is by giving a blow job.
Do 'mystery' cracked ribs heal any quicker than regular ones?
Just sucked my third dick in the past twelve hours. I must want AIDS.
I feel like I just rode a horse, did a million jumping jacks, ran a marathon and need a carton on cigarettes. best sex hands down... EVER
Also I fell in love w a girl dressed as a pirate that was great at doing the limbo
So nowhere in the dress code does it forbid me from showing up to City Hall in a gorilla suit to meet the mayor.
We looked in every room for condoms... It was the sexiest scavenger hunt ever.
Would it be sad if I made a blanket fort to get drunk in till the power came back?
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Some guy is here to get laser hair removal on his balls. I hate my job.
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