I hate the awkward morning-after-I-took-your-virginity conversations.
Its like the long john silvers of colleges, I wouldnt even go there to use the bathroom
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
He kept screaming "it's so seductive" while he was humping the wall
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
All I kmoe is rheres a coffee pot full pf vodka in my purse
I feel like the way you told me you weren't pregnant was pretty anticlimactic.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
"DO YOU LIKE FLYING KITES" WORKED AS A PICKUP LINE. SUCK IT.
I gave him a bunch of ideas to use to spice up their sex life. Say what you will, I am the best 'other' woman ever!
Oh god. I just had a sex dream about the talking dog from the Bush's Baked Beans commercials.
my ass is still wet. this is highly unpleasant. give me 5 to get changed and I'm all yours. or you can yell things to me while I shower and burn clothes
I expect you will be there for a drunken 3way with my husband again this new year.
Randomize
