After three games of beer pong ending in victory by death cup, all four of us bonded in the fact that we all slept with the girl's boyfriend at some point in time in the past year. She had no idea.
I burst into tears on the boat this morning because we bumped a duck in the head. I am way too hung over for today
Yikes. I usually have a 24-hour waiting period between sex partners. You know, like for a handgun.
I keep telling myself last night was not real, not real, not real. Then I remember I can't move. This hangover is too fucking real.
So i know i shouldnt being spending random large amnts of money...but i just bought a sword.
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
He looks like he was the one that always had koolaid stains around his mouth as a kid, he can fuck off.
I literally cut myself out of my pants. What is my life.
He's mad at me because I said I wouldn't date him if his dick was smaller. I fail to see the issue
Do you think it would be weird to add her on Facebook?
You just commited a felony act together, I honestly think we're beyond this.
sometime during the night he found me in the empty hotttub singing marvins room in only my bra.
Everytime I give him head I make him rub my back. Teamwork at it's finest.
Would it defeat the purpose of a run if I ran to McDonalds?
Shit happens dude.
Shit doesn't just HAPPEN on the kitchen floor you asshole.
I came and sneezed at the same time. Words can't describe how awesome it was.
Randomize
