didnt we say no more talking to eachother
it will help you get over me i promise
im horny
ok i will unlock the door
Does this mean you'll turn into an Albanian at the next full moon?
I just want to get to the point in our relationship where I can get on top of her and fart and we can both laugh...not just me.
got arrested for "breaking and entering" last night when i supposedly went into the wrong house made a sandwich and tried jerking off to porn on the tv...the cops told me they came in while my dick was out...oh and i missed work this morning and got fired
While my grandpa showed the family a slide show he accidentally included a topless photo of his new gf.
No one even knew you were hurt until we saw the multiple cuts to prove it, and when we asked what happened all you could say was "I fell out"
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
If you value your immune system buddy, walk away from that one.
I LOVE YOU NO MATTER HOW MANY BALLS YOUVE SUCKED
Wanna know what sucks. Banging the bosses daughter at work and having the boss walk in while you are fucking on his desk. Good day though. Made 6 sales
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
How did i get home and why am i wearing someone elses shorts?
1. Not sure how 2. You showed up naked, we had to dress you.
I think it's your fault my nipples aren't sensitive anymore.
Sometimes you have good days, sometimes m you delete 360 screenshots off your camera roll.
Randomize
