yep. he's not circumcised. how did it take me six months to realize THAT?
he doesn't have near as many excuses as you..and his are usually pretty legit. like "i'm having a baby." that's pretty legit.
sex in a ball pit. and I thought ghandi did great things.
His rich uncle has six months to live. I feel pregnant.
I wish I could rewind to my 8th birthday instead. I wanna wake up, eat as much cake as I want, and have a Transformers birthday party without someone judging me.
I guess I just stopped wanting to rip his balls out and started being okay with him being alive. that's a typical feeling for exes right?
Biggg time. I found 2 empty packages of extenze in my car this am.... not sure what that was all about
Sleeping in a car was not on my list of plans for the night.
Ate a live seahorse, then tried to order a nacho bell grande from an ATM.
How the fuck do you get to keep practicing as a Nurse.
Nah. After about 5 shots he decided he needed to clean the gutters. We're headed to the hospital now so meet us there.
Im including "no monologues past 1am" in the list of apartment rules. Theatre majors dude.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
I'm sorry for what I said when I was orgasming
the cop said "drunk and disorderly" like it was a bad thing
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
Randomize
