she looked like the before picture.
Remind me that when I'm pregnant, I should NOT post vaginal dilation updates on my facebook. Ever.
the kid next to me in training is drinking sangria. its 9am here in case you couldnt calculate. its going to be a good year.
If I don't come back from Italy with aids I did somethign wrong
I thought I walked in on an orgy of smurfs. Man I love shrooms
Put you drinking hat aside for Tuesday. My buddy is bartending!
I just puked in my drinking hat.
I want to do something romantic. Like gargle champagne before I put your dick in my mouth.
I found out Naomi Campbell and I have the same birthday and I feel like that explains so much
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
I just got hit on at the bar by a guy who used his mother as a wingman, she was pretty convincing. Only in Stratford.
I'm pretty sure I hallucinated the existence of an entire human being last night.
i feel like a cleansing fire is the only way to purify the house
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Gotta love college... Pregamed for my 8:30 flight home this morning and gave the flight attendants all high fives when I got on the plane. Best ride of my life.
Randomize
