Dual....:-)
someone owes me an orgasm
Hey guys. This is Daniel texting on mayas phone. if she called you and told you that i made her have sex with me in my doghouse with my dog present that wasn't true.... so dont spread that.
Just met a guy who has been in college for 7 years and still classified as a junior. Then watched him shotgun 10 beers. Found my new hero
Never underestimate the healing power of vomiting and a bath.
Lets start the night off early. Those Coronas arent going to throw themselves up.
I don't want to eat him, he probably tastes terrible.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
How can I look at her with a straight face when she has dry puke on her eye lid
She was throwing my stuff away and then before I knew it she was sucking my dick. It was like some fucked up sour patch kids commercial
Just watched a girl fall down the stair and be to drunk to get up. The only stair in the bar. It's like watching a turtle on it's back.
Sarah's knitting me a hat as an apology for unknowingly making out with my boyfriend
I love it when he cheats on me with nice people
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
I'm sorry about the spring break comment. I won't make anymore pornos, I promise.
The gift for sixth anniversary is steel. He bought me handcuffs. Inee I married the right man!
Randomize
