3:40 am: you never wrote back on my facebook wall
I'm so horny!
I'm so hungry
WHAT A TERRIBLE REPLY!
For your pussy...
Pretty sure I only gave out my other # though. You know, 777 777-7777
Hahaha. So was it a Freudian slip, or wishful thinking? ;)
Could be either seeing as you're in my phone as "3rd bar" and I couldn't pick you outta a line up.
New low. Found an ant nibbling on my last xanax. Flicked it away and popped it in my mouth anyways.
it's like heaven, but drunker
Lesbians are nicde people they do not take debit cards
Well he has that kind of carefree attitude that comes from a big penis
Can't promise anything, there's vodka in my thermos
im just laying here pukin in my mouth and swallowing it 'cause im WAY too lazy to actually get up and find a place to vomit. this is my life now.
I dont know about you but I'm not getting out of bed this summer for anything but food or sex
I may or may not go. send a pic of a nipple so I know how much fun you're having
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
He's beautiful. His facial hair makes me wanna cum in it
Ew, no. But yeah I feel the same
Just took a shot of 151, rimmned my middle finger in it, lit it on fire and lit a cigarette off it while flicking off my boss. How was your night??
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
Randomize
