You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
hahaha he is wasted in math class right now and is drawing all the planets in order from the sun
i rewarded my self with tacobell for not throwing up on any one. MISTAKE
I should just wear a shirt that says "Im Sorry" on the front because the second we land in Vegas, I'm going to be a fuckin trainwreck.
I just smoked pot in front of my old Elementary School. It's like my Childhood and Adulthood are coming together in this awesome thing.
i never thought it was possible to fit gay, redneck and asian into the same sentence before i met you.
and this wasn't even the first one i'd hooked up with
It hit me after I slept with his best friends and brother, that maybe I took it a bit far
Apparently I was holding on to a pizza crust for hours last night.
We tried to make ramen in a glass bowl on the stove. They called facilities to pick the glass out of the door
I needed 3am water. Not 3am shots of rum.
Let's drink tonight I promise I'll make it out of the house
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
Remember that guy that walked around our house naked with a boner wearing nothing but his winter coat? Well, he has a kid now.
For future reference: bathtub full of cheeseburgers = win.
It was probably the most embarrassing moment of my life. But I had cleavage, so I'm good!
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