i am so afraid to go to the bathroom. i am afraid i am going to fall asleep on the toillet.
Special does not even begin to describe that text.
kindergarten is hard when you're hung over.
I drunkenly sent a picture of my scrotum to the entire baseball team last night
There is still throw up in my sink from before break. God I missed this place
She told me that as long as she kept starring at the freckle on her arm she wouldnt throw up
I just found our entire wall-to-wall from September 2006 printed out and clipped... it's 49 pages. Blackout me is so considerate of bored-at-work me
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
I think I met somebody from your birthday this past weekend. He said I held a push up contest outside the bar and told them I would make out with the winner. He said he won..
If this were a real emergency kilted men wielding claymores and riding giant badgers would hve rescued said Guinness. So clearly this is just a hypothetical
You have no idea I looked like the porno version of Laura Ingalls Wilder
So I've been in more fights on one leg than I've had on two.
Who are you, and why are you in my phone as Elf on the Shelf
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
dont know what thebfuxk is in rhat shit, but dont lemme have antmore
Randomize
