Truelife: I made out with my ex-boyfriend's girlfriend this weekend. Thank you Captain Morgan...
Was she wearing cherry chapstick??
No. Life's not always a fairytale.....
He said he had a gf but the monogamy was "only implied".
who knew that if you vomit while skydiving the puke goes up towards the people that are behind you.
Should I feel bad that I fucked her and made her ride my little brothers razor scooter home?
he just asked if we wanted to go to an arts and crats club with him tomorrow. every day it becomes harder for me to defend his sexuality
I just don't know about this life anymore. Quite frankly I think I belong up there in the great blue, lounging on a cloud sippin tea with Jesus
Happiness was finding the hidden Gatorade in the fridge
Im gunna just be that one ballerina in the low V leopard thong leotard and everyone else can be boring and prude with their little pink tights on.
The brazilian leg lock that the stripper put me in was definitely the highlight of the night
I mean I kinda plunged vagina first into my last relationship
Ok thats it i need a list. Full names, nicknames, in which frats, with a photo, of all the guys youve hooked up with because three of the same guys is ridiculous
My gay card got upgraded to platinum status today.
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
This whole pope visit thing is ruining me having sex.
We drove through Taco-Bell on our way to the ER
Randomize
