Fucking hipsters really piss me off man. They are just such punk as bitches, all of them. Oh, and fuck Ed Hardy too.
I saw those LARP guys in the street again. One is hot, the other looks like Corey Fieldman's retarded son.
all the sharp corners in my house are covered with litter foam blocks. al set for partying
they told me her nickname is "wizard sleeve"
pick me up NOW
I stole an ensure out of their fridge and started chugging it. That was when Maria made me leave.
Unless you're gonna start buying my underwear, you have got to stop ripping it off of me.
She keeps feeding me drugs. Its like I'm her baby bird or something
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
My tweets this weekend consisted of me telling every bar I went to that they were my favorite valentine. I've never felt like more of an alcoholic
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
Condoms and Ice Cream, that's all we need.
Vodka Red Bull is like your spinach if you were Popeye
If I could steal your goatee and hide it under my bed to keep your from wearing it, I would.
Is it too forward if I ask him to bring a condom when he comes over to work on our project?
I didn’t not spend thanksgiving morning making out with him in a diner parking lot
Randomize
