I puked while I was brushing my teeth this morning and had to get a new tbrush
Ew, did you brush them again?
Yeah but i puked on the new one and decided to give up...failure
OMFG, I'm seriously about to get fairly unpolite with this guy.
Wow. I bet he's shakin' in his boots.
I told him I was prego. He asked coul we do it without a condom now since I cldn't get any pregnanter. What an a-hole.
We need to talk in the morning. The guy I was with just interpreted me taking off my earrings as code for "let me take off my pants."
I managed to throw up 90 feet under water, just removed my breathing tube, puked, put it back in. All inclusive is the way to go.
she hid the dish soap because she was afraid someone would confuse it with the margaritas and drink it instead. her reasoning was "theyre both soo pink...i cant tell them apart"
I'm trying to spell out I love you with a series of photos of my penis, but I just realized I can't do the Y of you
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
The cops knocked on our door just to ask us if we were really having a no-pants party.
I'm honestly considering asking her if I can eat her out, as a friend.
seriously, who doesn't want to get shitfaced and have sex to the backstreet boys?
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
I just wanna get high and take a fucking awesome nap. Those are my goals for the week.
He literally just patted me on the vagina and said goodnight to it.
Shit facedness and cuddling are what you have to look forward to this evening.
Randomize