I slayed a troll last night at BC guess i thought i was back in college
it's like i warped into dreamland and the only thing that makes sense is my solo cup
Things on my life to do list: hold a pound of marijuana. Check.
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
Hurry up I might actually study if I am left alone
Corey Haim died. 80's me is so sad
We don't have a lot of plans besides weed and cake
So I vaguely remember making out with you this morning, I think you were on a date?
And there might be a gallon of sangria without the lid on the floor in your room. Just be careful when you open the door.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
I was having the most awesome dream about onion rings and you hit me and told me to stop touching you...WTF?
Probably going to live on vodka sodas and fireball shots
My boobs smell like weed again. This happens way too often.
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
Randomize
