Finally jerked of with a banana peel.
why dont you just whore around college until someone loves you...thats how it works for girls isnt it?
At one point we asked the guy to play "the lion sleeps tonight" with his bagpipes. Best version ever.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
i was so fucked up i thought i was at home depot
having someone tell me to "prepare my vagina" is not really something I want to hear..
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
He insisted that I looked like Kiefer Sutherland, told me he didn't know what to do about it, then hugged me awkwardly.
I would convert to being a Republican and Mormon just to sleep with Romney's sons. The things I would to do them.
Well call me tomorrow, it's a great story that may lead to me being fired and/or possibly being buried in a shallow grave somewhere out in wine country.
All i really wanna do tonight is get drunk with you and dance on tables. is that too much to ask?
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
just found the "let's take a picture before we do these roommates" before picture
thank god there was never an after picture.
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