sometimes i wish i was the girl in a porno. that way if i couldn't get any, i'd just order a pizza and do him.
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
I had to move some guys boxers out of the dryer. This is the closest I'll be getting to dick this month.
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
He fucked volume into my hair. It was amazing.
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
FACE TIME HER WHILE YOU GUYS BANG
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
If you sleep with him again I'll have you spayed
Riddle me this: I can stream porn just fine but try and watch my college class and nooo it won't work
Be there in 4 minutes
learning about efficiency and effectiveness in an administration seminar. real world application: walking across the street to the pub on break to shotgun a beer.
there is glitter all over my balls
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
They got skeletons in the booths to enforce social distancing.
Thought they were weekend at berniesing that shit at first.
Randomize
