We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
Mother nature decided I wasn't going to be a whore today. Fuck her.
The guy in the library beside me just whipped out an entire loaf of bread, a knife and a container of peanut butter and is proceeding to make multiple sandwiches.
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
I will miss his soup and his dick the most
This is breast cancer awareness month... The least we can do is give a stripper some singles.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
All i want to do is drink fuck and cry... you dont have to cater all three its more like the saddest choose your own adventure ever
You're only allowed to hookup with one freshman a semester. MAKE IT COUNT.
You can see my drunken state get worse with each picture
The last thing I remember was wearing a sombrero and trying to do cartwheels in the club
You did one successfully. Then smashed into the wall
You can't Tinder AND have him bring you icecream in the same night. It messes with your vagina.
You're an independent woman who is defined by her own actions and not by whether or not you have a man. You also have great tits.
I need to wash the frat house off of me
Then you got drunk and shit in her car. Nothing before that matters. She isn’t calling you back.
Randomize
