dude, i look like john mccains neck right now
North Korea, Best Korea!
I served up a girl her first a2m the other day. You would have been proud.
Dude you called me last night to let me listen to you piss in a cup and drink it. Just making sure you survived
"fuck a duck" is spelled out in chinese food on my counter... im kind of nervous to search the rest of my house......
well i had to explain to their mom why the kids i babysit for won't stop repeating the phrase "nice juicy guido"
well we could tame deer to let us ride on them. does that work?
Biggest penis I've ever pity fucked
nothing says roomie bonding better than a sunday shroom trip.
Anything that comes outta your cooch is bound to be breathtaking
That could use a little rephrasing
You know you're in the hamptons when it's 10pm And you kind of want to vomit white wine on rug that costs more than your apartment.
Your feet probs hurt bc the cab driver kicked us out a mile from home after you wouldn't stop screaming "prohibition can suck my dick"
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
Don't drag this out. All I need to know is if I have to put pants on or not.
His junk had piercings everywhere. The dick and balls. It was a fucking pirate penis.
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