so wait, they're fucking, but it doesn't count as cheating cause they only do anal?
Are you seriously picking mariokart over a blowjob? nott to sound like a bitch but seriously?
i don't care what you say, the winery is open and 10am is NOT too early to go barrel tasting
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
You love him. Dinosaurs. Math. Sex.
What started as a "classy" double date ended with Jeremy and I tripping our balls off and talking to the refrigerator while the girls cried on the couch and questioned where their lives were heading.
She gave such good road head it was turned into side-of-the-road head for everyone's safety
she tried to deny peeing on the floor last night. she said she wouldn't make it to the bathroom only to pee on the floor
oh but she would
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
Wait.....I ate a raw potato lastnight.
I HAVENT SEEN A PENIS IN 5 WEEKS I REFUSE TO REMAIN CALM
well all i have to say, besides fuck you, is YOU try assembling ikea shelves while high on molly.
I don't want my vagina anymore.
His Australian accent during sex made me think I was in an Outback Steakhouse commercial
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
Randomize
