why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
I dont think that drinking by ourselves on a saturday night counts as being "fun alcoholics"
He just said "wow, thats some rly nice hair! And those teeth..thosee are some cool teeth"
We were squawking at each other for over an hour like chickens. Literally. Never touching the stuff again and never again showing my face at that Denny's.
There are not enough shots in the world for this. We walked in and they shouted "the pilgrims are here!" And then someone handed me a turkey leg the size of my arm.
Europeans suck. I just gave him head and somehow i am the one paying for the coffee
The bartender asked if I wanted a to-go cup for my crown and coke.....I just realized I'm back in Montana and fuck did I miss home.
Bad breakup?
He posted a pic of me fully naked and smiling as he inserted a carrot into my vagina as my FB profile pic and then changed the PW, locking me out of my own account. So 500 of my closest friends, family, and coworkers now have that mental image of me on FB.
Climbing out Mr. Friday night's bathroom window. He thinks I'm puking. Be on state st. with the getaway car and if you could bring me a shirt and some advil that'd be dandy.
So proud. See you in five. I've got coffee.
When did we convert life to cartoon?
I feel that my cleavage set an unattainably high bar for 2013.
I ate a hotdog off the ground last night.
So, got kind of drunk last night, made out with some guy, and somehow stole his credit card. Don't even know.
Listen, I bought the coke that got us those free drinks, okay? Show some respect.
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
