Just saw a car with license plate GYPSYS that was full of gypsies
When I masturbate I pretend my dick is the slap chop an I'm destroying vegtables. Do you think that's a eating disorder?
2 am we went back to his house. his mom handed us beers and cooked us pancakes. the next morning his dad had washed my car. i lied. living at home after college definitely does not suck.
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
The drunken tricycle race really added some class to the Tour de Franzia. Until everyone wiped out and started puking.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
The lego bong didn't work. Just made us look stupid
At least I cut out the pieces of your hair where I braided gum into it last night. Thank me later.
You grabbed her hand and started jacking her finger off. She was horrified.
Did it finish?
You just kept yelling and saying, "IM NOT GOING TO STOP YELLING UNTIL YOU TAKE THAT SHOT"
wow thanks for pushing me towards an older man
you gotta start somewhere if you're going to be a trophy wife
How could she say that about my foreskin when she hasn't even seen all the cool stuff I can do with it?
He better be a good lay, these underwear cost $50.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
He grabbed at it like it was a stress ball or something. It's a boob, not a grapefruit. The fuck.
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