Theyr drawing diagrams to try to explain to me how high they are
A lesson I learned in the hospital....when you masturbate while attached to a heart monitor, it scares the nurses a lot.
just saw a former disney star do a keg stand. her life choices have improved.
Apparently I also called my credit card company to demand a credit limit increase. I'm so content with not drinking another 60 days
I don't know, But i remember him licking ecstasy off my boobs and my boyfriend cheering him on
I never want to hear the words 'my therapist says . . . ' while naked again.
I gave her at least chlamydia. Maybe worse. She is also into chicks and loves taking naked pics. It's like the less I believe in Jesus, the more he rewards me.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
I just hit myself in the face while taking off my shirt. I could never be a stripper.
I mean, you got a giant dick. I've seen lawn gnomes that are smaller.
oh, i solved that problem. i told him i wanted to steal my roommate's nephew. radio silence. haven't heard from him since.
But the real reason your aunt is drunk crying is because she has already had four margs and went for a 5th and someone is trying to stop her
You just kept yelling GET YOUR SKATES ON, BITCHES. WE'RE GOING STREAKING.
I really hope this is just a phase, because I am not capable of carrying both of our drunken whore asses through life. Too much dead weight....
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
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