I just walked in on my mom and dad......It wasn't my dad
there was a guy who was being paid to stand outside of Abercrombie without a shirt on... normally i would be okay with this but he was 40...
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
Doing lines and watching a show on hot dogs around the world ... Why do I do this to myself
He probably has his cowboy hat on, that's his house hat.
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
it's a simple rule - pass out shirtless on the couch, become an airsoft target.
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
So far my survey results are telling me to pawn the ring. Thoughts?
Well I'm glad your Saturday night went a lot better than mine. I spent mine crying in a McDonald's parking lot.
You're the only person I know who's experienced a micropenis and a magnum XL penis
This was the first funeral I've ever attended where I had to pee behind a bush cuz someone was passed-out drunk in the locked bathroom. Steve would have been proud.
He chose me to be his birthday sex..theres a lot of pressure riding on this bang
I tried to fuck you in my bathroom while my parents were in the next room. I am a clusterfuck of fun.
Randomize
