I wasn't trying to make you feel bad, I just agreed with you that your life does suck.
is it bad that I only want to go to my boyfriends house bc I want to see his roomate walk around with his shirt off?
the clerk said it was the first time she had ever seen someone walk in the next day to return the tux still wearing the tux
You unbuttoned your shirt and started walking down the center of the road screaming traffic stops for Enrique Iglesias.
We're doing a case race on Saturday.
I'm in. I'm currently drinking a beer in the bathtub so I guess I can consider this "practice" and not just "alcoholism"
Ya well here is the deal with last night, it was the Biggest shit show we have ever co-stared in.
The only thought that went through my head was "that would be an absolute disaster" so of course I said yes
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
I didn't want to walk to anymore parties because I found a cat. It was magical.
If a handjob meant commitment I would literally touch zero dicks
I'm doing the walk of shame into my therapists office wearing his clothes...I guess go big or go home
We were all having a bath, the three of us, then that drug dealer guy walked in and peed. Sitting down. Apparently he didn't want to offend us.
You know those times when you're sitting down for a while and r like damn I'm sober but then stand up and r like WOAH HOLD UP.
Today I saw someone riding a horse on the sidewalk by aldi when I went to walmart. Old town road was playing on the radio. It was perfect.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
