we just decided that lesbian tuesdays are a must, as of tomorrow.
jacking off on stolen wireless... gotta enjoy the small things in life
He kept referring to his penis a his "love gun"
Be here at 3:30. We'll find out how much beer can fit in a Mini Cooper.
as we were driving back from the frat house he pulled down his pants and convinced me his penis "wanted some air"
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
at least the cop wrote "happy birthday" on the ticket.
but you must be fair and judge his penis by normal penis standards and not let your vision be clouded by the rare gem of a penis you have recently encountered
Need your help. He's locked himself in the bathroom with his bong and his childhood collection of Goosebumps books.
Never thought I would be taunted by little kids about my walk of shame
Uhm after 8 I don't recall anything. All I know is there's a picture of me playing pong with my grandmother.
I'm spring cleaning all of the fuck boys out of my life.
He stole my heart. I stole his identity.
You and I both know it takes more than prescription narcotics to keep our family down. See you around ten, brother.
Randomize
