so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
she's naming her girl london marie
that kid will be born with a tramp stamp
yay, now i'm not the only homewrecker.
yeah but i stopped sleeping with him after i found out he was married.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
Going to get yelled at but I labeled the reel "four dried up sluts decide going to the middle east to shop during a war is the best idea ever"
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
my mom and grandma just had a splits competition. slut runs in the family
Empowerment dancing to Touch Me in the Morning by Diana Ross. Handling this breakup SO well.
NoShamevember. You game?
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
I'm not sure why, but my salad smells like a Big Mac. Or maybe that's just the smell of yesterday's, seeping through my skin.
If he knew how badly I want to blow him he’d stop talking about his wife
Congratulations you now have a pet Scotsman.
You remember my neighbor with the perfect ass? It's even better in assless chaps.
Randomize
