so i realized that everyone figured out i was a slut before i did. then i realized that no one felt like telling me. sometimes i think you just keep me around for entertainment.
you're right.
i woke up this morning to a slap on the ass and jake saying "you should let me put it in your ass now" i need out of this relationship.
for sure. did you let him do it?
thats not the point.
i have a real life question, do ur boyfriends pretend to be vampires ever?
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
Ate pizza for the 3rd time today, can't decide if that's disgusting or an amazing aspect of American culture.
You should really come over right now. There's hot construction workers across the street. I'm gonna go pour beer on myself in a bikini on the sidewalk. See you in 5?
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Just picture a dyson vacuum with razor blades. That's how it felt.
I used the lotion his mom gave me for christmas to give him a hand job. It felt so wrong.
Their was just 7 people standing outside eating a costco chicken, definitley at the right party
You and Eric are like slutty bowling balls, and that poor family are the pins. They won't know what hit em.
strike, motherfucker.
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
Just did an entire nights worth of bar crawl in an hour. Boom
My dad just said "fuck circus"
I hid a TracFone in her bra. We'll find her tomorrow.
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