Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
Great date with Damon, but I'm not sure if telling him I like lesbian porn is a good second date discussion.
I'm tuning in to watch Heidi Montag crash and burn on the Miss Universe Pageant. Somebody call 911. and I'm not talking about the Sean Kingston song.
Hey. Did u tell any1 that I use Nuvaring?
Cuz 1 of ur bf's frat bros just asked me if I wanted to "play ring toss later"
considering i was high when my dad made me pee in the cup i might fail this one
everyone knows he gets back in a week and after that i'm not sleeping around anymore. it's like i have a expiration date.
Apparently I was trying to convince him Springsteen has had buttsex. I ended the argument with "I bet he came from it too."
You know how hard it is to play cool while not drowning and appreciating a pair of butts at the same time?
It has been so long since I got any action that I have decided to change my vagina's name from "the chamber of judgement" to "the cave of forgotten dreams".
I've never seen a dude bust out of his jacket and rock an air banjo like u
Happiness is having a 12 hour day thinking that there are only 2 beers in the fridge when you get home, but then finding 8. Fuck you Monday, this week I won.
I had sex on the roof of the dorm last night ... I feel like a combination of spiderman and van wilder
Oh like it's the first time I've had a bowl of wine
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Omg I just looked in my purse from last night.. 10 bags of gummy bears.
Randomize
