I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
I'm home alone watching The Hills seasons, eating pickles and drinking straight rye. I just googled "how to make friends". Probably not the most pro-active solution. Help.
Hey, don't feel sorry for me, the two girls in front of me just ordered 18 dollars worth of taco bell. Life could be worse.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
I just realized last night I drunk-bought a flight to Florida for this weekend...kinda torn between the price and the potential of awesomeness
I'm thinking about that time I was in a trashbag and you spray painted my hair yellow
we made it to hole 3 and then just sat down on the fairway and finished off our case....cheered on other golfers as we let them play through.
A DRUNK EMT IS BETTER THAN NO EMT!!!
What sexual position says im sorry for your loss?
Apparently all year they've been using me as a standard of drunkenness
Also, I've finally come to the point in the relationship when having sex with socks on is ok.
I can already feel the hangover I'll be having on New Year's Day. I don't know if I'm prepared for this.
Well he waved at me as he was leaving so he def noticed the staring, and by staring i mean blatant eye fucking from across the bar..
Arrived home from picking Mom and Nana up at the airport to find Marc buck ass nude beneath the Christmas tree. Nana says she always knew I was queer.
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
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