I think I have a pornographic memory.
Don't you mean photographic?
No.
After 10 years all I have gotten is one bra pic, at this point I should be able to draw your cervix from memory
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
fuck you guys, stop putting fake babies in my car the cops came again.
Appropriately today was the first time I've ever GTL'd. I can't believe I made fun of this,it's rather relaxing.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
They left me stranded on the side of the road with a table and five gallons of water. They said it was all I really needed to survive. People are staring
I am in my freshman residence hall trying to convince an Asian man to give me my pants back. Never. Drinking. Again.
I played "in the air tonight" on a drum set made of titties, and I'm not even exaggerating
I live vicariously through you. No one mistakes me for a hooker anymore. I look like a stay at home mom of three. On bad days of four.
you look like you're about to get down on your knees and give america the business.
I really thought I'd be the only alcoholic drinking alone in my car at noon in the Lowe's parking lot. Passed out dude in the car next to me begs to differ.
Should I get the rainbow boxer breifs???
As your boyfriend, this is a level of gay that even I can't handle.
They forgot my ranch. They're dead to me.
Somehow I just turned an entire McDonald's bag upside down in my car and not a single fry fell out. The Lord really does work in mysterious ways.
Randomize
