i feel like verizon should give a sexter of the month award
Just because he saw my boobs doesn't mean he knows me all of a sudden
A valiant attempt to obtain a backhoe was made
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
You were peeing on a bus yelling fuck public transit, congratulations.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
Yes she was blowing me but I couldnt see her face. The only light was from the sparklers she asked me to hold. I love 4th of July.
I drank a girls breast milk at this wedding. Shit was next level
He knocked me in the face with the phone during my light show. Didn't even feel it. Ecstasy is amazing
I forgot about snapchatting a pic of us, but I remember flossing with your hair.
I think the reason she hasn't text me back is because I spanked her ass with Hulk Hands
It's the third day of class and I got told I smell like a distillery.
So high that I just walked into class, late, sat down in my desk, and tried to buckle my seatbelt.
I don't know..He walked out of your room with a kraft single..and blood on his shirt...He really wanted cheese.
She has my name on her bucket list. I’m either getting laid or killed
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