i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
Do you think red sox nation has an official powerpoint template/memo format for resignations of manny support, bandwagon applications, and other official business?
Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
I just had teddy grams, ritz crackers, and twizzlers for dinner. Hello, end of the semester.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
i wish i could, but i promised myself i wouldn't sleep with anyone who couldn't grow a beard for a while. it's not you, it's crosby.
Well i have to fuck at least one of your roommates this year to keep the tradition alive.
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
It's a drunk scavenger hunt.
Everything on the list counts for double points if done naked.
Oh, AND I met a ukulele teacher that I'd date. So there's that.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
I can't go to the bars anymore. She wanted to see me again and I drunkenly told her I was moving today. If she spots me I'm fucked.
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
Sorry I missed your birthday party. I caught a dick and rode it to O-Town
Randomize
