would it be inappropriate to describe you with the phrase "bigass titties"?
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
Just bought myself a coach diaper bag. I thought it would be perfect for school. the baby bottle holders are where i'm gonna put my booze
i just got cum up my nose. i would have expected more from the captain of the men's lacrosse team
You yelled "sharpie war!" then jammed it in her ear
I'm making presurgery martini's. You need to be here.
The polaroid of me taking a test-tube of Jegar out of the gay guys mouth pretty much explains my trip to Spain.
We told you to stay put for 2 minutes. We come back out and your being handcuffed yelling "DO YOU FEEL LIKE A GOOD FUCKING PERSON ARRESTING ME ON MY BIRTHDAY?!"
I wrote my name on his balls in sharpie. In the homosexual world that's like a diamond ring. Shits permanent.
I was just hoping for a dick worthy of his established age.
Can I also remind you that we insisted on touching his mustache?
Well of course I remember it took up like 20 minutes of my night.
As the bouncer was escorting you out, you yelled "keep your filthy dick beaters off me!"
How do you delicately ask if your friend's dad was arrested for solicitation of prostitution?
What did you two do last night and why did Sam send me a picture of your dick?
I chose not to drink last night but drinking chose me
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